🛑 Stop Commenting on People’s Bodies 🛑
Lately, I’ve noticed how often body comments creep into everyday spaces - places that should feel safe, supportive, even sacred. Sometimes it’s framed as a compliment, sometimes it’s just an offhand remark. Either way, it leaves me (and so many others) cringing inside.
Because here’s the thing: commenting on people’s bodies - no matter the intention - is not okay.
And I know I’m not alone.
As a therapist and as a human, I can’t stress this enough: body comments are never harmless. Even when meant as compliments, they can trigger, minimize, or undo the hard work of self-acceptance. We owe each other something better - words that affirm who we are, not how we look. – Shelby Castile, LMFT
Why Body Comments Aren’t Okay
When someone comments on your body - whether it’s “You look great!” or “Wow, you’ve lost weight!” - it might sound harmless. Some people even think they’re offering a compliment. But here’s why it’s not okay:
You don’t know the story. That weight loss you’re praising might be grief, illness, or stress. That “healthy glow” might be exhaustion.
It keeps the spotlight on appearance. Our culture already tells us our worth is tied to our bodies. Each comment reinforces that old, unhelpful story.
It can be triggering. For people who’ve struggled with disordered eating, trauma, or perfectionism, body comments can hit like a punch in the gut.
Takeaway- Even when “positive,” they’re still harmful. ♡
My Therapist Lens
As a psychotherapist, I’ve seen firsthand how deeply these comments land. They stick. They echo. They can spiral into self-doubt and obsessive thinking. And for people already working hard on self-acceptance, a single remark can undo weeks of progress.
What You Can Do Instead
If you want to connect, encourage, or compliment someone, shift the focus away from bodies. Try:
“I love how dedicated you are to your practice.”
“Your energy in class is inspiring.”
“You bring such kindness into this space.”
Takeaway- These words affirm who someone is rather than what they look like. ♡
“What’s truly remarkable is how we love, how we show up for others, the resilience we build through struggle, the passions that light us up, and the kindness we bring into a room. Those are the things that make us unforgettable - not the size of our jeans or the number on a scale.”
“What matters is how we love, how we heal, and how we show up in the world.” - Shelby Castile, LMFT
A New Kind of Culture
We all have the power to create safer spaces - whether in yoga, in friendship circles, or at family gatherings. That starts with letting go of the habit of commenting on bodies altogether.
Because here’s the truth: our bodies are the least interesting thing about us.